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If there’s anything in the world of sophomoric humor that twitches BLZBUB’s tail, it is not having the time to invent and incorporate a theme into the recaps. Having a travel commitment or a conflicting honey-do task erase prep time is just aggravating. But all is not lost. BLZBUB has a file of ideas for recaps that can be drawn upon for tight deadlines. Not all of them work as sustainable themes. As Old Scratch is traveling later this week, it’s time to clear out some of the bad ideas.
Worn-up Round
1. The Chicago Lakefront Trail stretches 18 miles along the shore of this Great Lake: MICHIGAN. 2. Which Nazi war criminal wrote ‘Inside the Third Reich’? ALBERT SPEER. 3. Moratuwa and Kandy are two of the largest cities in: SRI LANKA. 4. Bob Feller became a 20th Century sports legend thanks to his skill at: THROWING A BASEBALL. 5. This sleep-related hormone is linked to seasonal affective disorder: MELATONIN. 6. Which sandwich is named after a comic strip character: DAGWOOD. 7. It is the oldest institution of higher learning in the U.S. after Harvard: WILLIAM & MARY. 8. Thomas Edison unveiled this machine for making multiple copies of documents in 1876: MIMEOGRAPH. 9. What is a Podunk: SMALL TOWN. 10. What is the name of President Andrew Jackson’s famous home? THE HERMITAGE.
That was a good round for us. As SCOOTR pointed out, all ten answers were pre-called. And on the topic of premature results…
There is always the temptation to rush a recap into publication with a less-than-interesting theme when the self-imposed deadline is looming. For some of them, BLZBUB just decides to roll the bones and see if a complete skeleton pops up. But more often than not, better judgment prevails. Hence no one was subjected to the “Proposed Names for Ben & Jerry Ice Creams” theme. My faithful readers were spared the agony of a joke based upon the wine-flavored ice cream, “The Grapeful Dad.” Or even the one with the accidental ingredient, “RattySnack.”
Talk about ‘ground down’.
Ground-down Round
1. Kate Bush is an acclaimed ___ singer-songwriter: ENGLISH. 2. Italy’s Scarpa is a worldwide leader in making: OUTDOOR FOOTWARE. 3. Beethoven’s Third Symphony was composed with this historical person in mind: NAPOLEON. 4. What is the capital city of Prince Edward Island? CHARLOTTETOWN. 5. This Representative of New York was a vocal advocate of women’s rights in Congress: GERALDINE FERRARO. 6. Which pro sports team played its first game in 1977? MONTREAL BLUE JAYS. 7. ‘Look on my works, ye mighty, and despair!’ is a famous line of poetry written by: PERCY BYSSHE SHELLEY. 8. Master Chef Gordon Ramsey hails from: SCOTLAND. 9. ‘Dogfish’ is a term loosely applied to several types of small: SHARKS. 10. The southern Chinese city of Yulin is famous, or infamous, for its annual ___ Festival. DOG MEAT. 11. Theravada, The Doctrine of the Elders, is a: BRANCH OF BUDDHISM. 12. John C. Malone is a major name in: AMERICAN BIG BUSINESS.
This was another stellar round. There was some debate on the answer to select on GD 4 and 12, but the rest of these queries were simple enough that they all drew pre-calls.
Another promising theme that never made it to publication was one based on military acronyms
FUBAR – Fucked Up Beyond All Repair: a bad situation that can’t be remedied
BOHICA – Bend Over, Here It Comes Again: sometimes used when told there’s going to be a visit by the Inspector General.
FLCPFM- Fine Lingering Cloud of Pink Fuzzy Mist: the result of an explosives accident.
Umm yeah, that turned dark really fast, but most acronyms used by the rank and file are scatological in nature.
Scatology Round {BOHICA!}
S1. Bestselling authors v U.S. HISTORY
The National Board of Review of ___ was founded in New York City in 1909:
MOTION PICTURES. {BLZBUB had a speaking role on this one.}
S2. SCIENCE EXPERTS ONLY v Egyptian mythology
Who would be most concerned with a Bayer designation? ASTRONOMER. {An early call for Chemist was eliminated first, leaving the team in a quandary.}
S3. G-D-P-F-V ANIMAL KINGDOM v Vancouver
Which creature belongs to the Genus Hydrochoerus? CAPYBARA. {RATS! Big aquatic RATS! We sank into a swamp here.}
S4. Egyptian Mythology v BESTSELLING AUTHORS
‘The Collector’ is just one of many best-selling novels by this prolific author:
NORA ROBERTS. {We had a pre-call for an author which did not appear on the list of choices. Oof! From there on it was a scramble.}
S5. Vancouver v SCIENCE EXPERTS ONLY
If you’re incredibly smart, you know that 13.605 Electron Volts is the:
RYDBERG CONSTANT. {While not incredibly swift, we did manage to answer this one correctly. Thanks SCOOTR.}
S6. U.S.HISTORY v g-d-p-f-v Animal kingdom
Where did George Washington deliver the nation’s first State of the Union Address?
FEDERAL HALL. {New York City? Get a rope!}
Only three correct for the full points, a disappointing result.
Here’s another failed result of a potential theme. Bad pharmaceuticals. Here comes the drug for teenagers with bad skin, Urzitzapopin. There are tales of sleep walkers using Ambien. How long until we see the development of a drug to create the walking dead…Zombatrex? This got BLZBUB to think about the religious suicide cults that need a better fatal drug, Endemall.
Frightening Round
1. In 1972, Rockwell International was awarded the contract to build the: SPACE SHUTTLE. 2. Donald Trump recently made controversial, derogatory comments about: MEXICAN IMMIGRANTS. 3. This anti-war novel is one of the earliest works by John Dos Passos: THREE SOLDIERS. 4. The curved surface of a liquid in a container is called a: MENISCUS. 5. Who puts on her dancing shoes in the classic Gene Kelly film ‘An American in Paris’? LESLIE CARON. 6. Which animal belongs to the order of Casuariiformes? EMU. 7. This book series by Jeff Kinney was introduced online before taking book form: DIARY OF A WIMPY KID.
There was a long moment of silence upon seeing F3. It was not resolved in time for many to score. The rest of the round was handled with dispatch.
After the Jazz moved to Salt Lake City, BLZBUB was once asked what the name of the basketball team in New Orleans should be. “It should be the Jazz, and SLC can sue to get it back. Or better yet THEY should rename their team to the Mormons, or just shorten it to the Morons.” Other teams should be renamed. For instance, the football team in Indianapolis should be renamed the Bolts, because of how they left Baltimore. And the team in Washington could switch to the Seminoles, since that nation has no problem with a team being named for them. Etc.
Py-Ram-It Round
P1. Arrernte is a group of languages that is spoken in:
CENTRAL AUSTRALIA. {We bled type ABO, as no one knew this Austral group of tongues.}
P2. This structure’s Gate of Life and Gate of Death were found at opposite ends:
ROMAN COLOSSEUM. {Carry our scores out of the Gate of Death for this one. We who are about to trivialize, salute you.}
P3. Which literary character graduated from Yale in 1915?
NICK CARRAWAY. {MEERA made the good call here.}
P4. The Loire River flows 629 miles before emptying into the:
ATLANTIC OCEAN. {DUFF correctly said Bay of Biscayne, but the team failed to make the connection while distracted by the idea of the Mediterranean Sea.}
P5. Which painter is famous for putting the letters ‘Le Jou’ in some of his works?
PICASSO. {MEERA also pre-called this one, saving our butts for the Py-Ram-It Round.}
Finally, there was the misanthropic idea of the grand finale. There’s already an Unfinished Symphony. Wouldn’t it be nice to hear the Prodigal Sonata? Who’d not want to attend a concert featuring the Coitus Interludus? But after you get home and turn on the TV you’d be bombed with commercials for i-Finale featuring the Apple Turnoverture?
FINAL TRAGEDY
Tonight’s Topic: GREEK MYTHOLOGY
In Greek mythology, Deianira was the second wife of:
1. Jason
2. Hercules
3. Apollo
4. Jupiter
5. Remus
The order of the eliminations was 1, 3, 5, and 4, leaving #2, HERCULES, as the correct answer. And in a stunning example of how crappy television shows have a modicum of educational value, BLZBUB thanked Kevin Sorbo for knowing this answer. Of course, ever the peevish one, BLZBUB has to point out the irony that the Buzzheads used the Latin spelling for the Greek hero Herakles in their Greek mythology question.
Special recognition for this game goes to our distaff contingent. Both JAX and MEERA answered a ton of questions this game. JAX gets credit for the following: WU 1 & 6, GD 5, F 2, 4 & 6. MEERA gets full or partial credit for WU 3, GD 1, 4, 7, 8, 10 and 11, F7, and P 3 & 5. That’s a total of 16 of the 42 questions. Well done!
The team got the full amount of points wagered on this question, thus salvaging a score in the mid-40’s. The top qualifying boxes showed 45229, 44458, 44455, 43941, 43708, and 43314 points for this game. The team composite score was 44,184 points. While a few thousand short of our recent average scores, it was good enough to place BWW Gibson in Albuquerque in TENTH Place overall.
The game must have been a tough one, as the top system-wide score was only 52435 points. That was put up by The Fellowship, a team that is on a role this summer. Second place went to Stained Glass Pub in MD, site of Triviapalooza 7. Third/Fourth place honors belong to either Fab Ferns of MN or Mad River in NY as the next highest non-Borg site.
_________________
}}}--( (x) (x) )--->
Oh my gawd, they killed
Ken Z.
You bastards!
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